Wednesday, February 01, 2006


So here's the deal. On February 1, 2006, a friend unwittingly
forwarded a hoax email that claimed that the Voting Rights Act was
expiring. I was inspired to respond and that one response has sort of morphed
into "Musings of a New Millennium Nigga." Here's that original response:

With today's false alarm about the Voting Rights Act, I was reminded of
an issue that few Americans seem to be aware of...

Did you know that as of 2013 the Emancipation Proclamation will expire?
Unsure that the social experiment of free Blacks would be a success,
President Lincoln included a seldom discussed 150 year limit into the
famous document. But before you call your Senators to suggest that slavery be
permanently outlawed in America, consider the upside of this oft
disparaged institution.

1. No unemployment - With joblessness and shiftlessness as major
contributors to urban blight, wouldn't it be refreshing to see a day
where every man, woman and child is gainfully employed. Okay, well not
gainfully...but employed nonetheless.

2. Community building - With gang violence having ravaged so many of
America's cities, I find myself nostalgic for the days before crips and
bloods when we were divided only as field niggers and house niggers.
That was the way God intended it and that is the way it should be.

3. Fitness - In our couch potato society, when was the last time you
had to run for your life? I'll tell you what...Running from bloodhounds and
lynch mobs all the way from Tuscaloosa, Alabama to Detroit, Michigan is a
much better weight loss program than Tae-Bo.

4. Nutrition - Okay, so there wouldn't be an improvement in this area,
but when you consider the shit we eat these days...Would there really be a
drop-off? Below the 10 Freeway is the land of the soul food
restaurant. At least then we would get our chitterlings for free. And when we got
hypertension and diabetes and were debilitated by other obesity-related
diseases we would have someone to blame besides ourselves.

As I consider myself a part of the talented tenth, I assume that I will
be able to opt out of 21st century slavery. If not, maybe I will be
"employed" by the Slavery Network. Hey I could be a staff writer on the new Meth
& Red show...if I'm lucky. can't be beat!



Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now that's "WHOA"!


9:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I married an absolute fool.


9:08 PM  

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