Sunday, April 23, 2006

Letters To A Young Colored Girl

Perhaps it was the audacity of "The Musings Of A New Millennium Nigga." Perhaps it was the unadulterated -- yet undiagnosed and unmedicated -- insanity of the rantings over these months. I suspect I will never fully know what led this particular young woman to write to A New Millennium Nigga. But once I read her letter, I knew I had to respond.

Dear NMN,

This afternoon after church, I read a story in the newspaper about a Black woman, a stripper and a student at North Carolina Central, who says that three white Duke Lacrosse players raped her. I'm finding the whole thing very upsetting and was wondering if you would do a "First of all...Fuck Duke Lacrosse players!" entry for all the sistahs out there.

Sincerely,
Sha'quaLanda Jenkins




Dear Sha'quaLanda,

First of all…fuck Black Women! As a member of an "endangered species" – which, by the way, classifies Black men as NOT BEING FUCKING HUMAN! – I am shocked that you would be so selfish and self-centered. We, in the Black community, have always had an understanding. Your worries, your woes, yours trials and muthafuckin’ tribulations as "sistahs" will be addressed if and when we ever get around to restoring the manhood of the Black Man. Helloooooo. Hasn’t anybody ever told you this shit?

By the way, why is your name Sha'quaLanda?

Best Wishes,
NMN


Dear NMN,

Second of all...fuck you, too! My name is Sha'quaLanda because that's what my mama named me.

Now I expect you to address this issue. After writing "Fuck Oprah!" and "Fuck Destiny's Child!" you are skating on some thin muthafuckin' ice with Black women as it is. Do not make me take off my earrings and put no vaseline on my face! I ain't had no pepper under my nails in a while and I would love nothing more than to fuck your bitch-ass up.

Hugs and Kisses,
Sha'quaLanda


Dear Sha'quaLanda,

Alright. Alright. I sure don't want to be faced with a "mad Black woman." I have actually written the words "Fuck God!" and I still wasn't as scared for my life as I was when I wrote "Fuck Black women!" But hear me out.

The Black woman in America has always gotten the shit end of the stick. I guess I'm surprised that you're upset. I mean, White men raping Black women...? That's a Confederate tradition, isn't it? I don't know what happened in that house and neither do you, I'm guessing. But we both know that more than a few massas paid visits to the slave quarters with the smell of tobacco lingering in the still North Carolina night air. That's why this case has struck a nerve, if you ask me...which you did...in a way.

By the way, where are you from anyway? And how old are you? You use a lot of curses. You know, profanity is just a lazy mind trying to express itself.

Peace,
NMN


Dear NMN,

I'm 13. I'm from Brooklyn. And you've got a fucking nerve, Mr. Fuck This and Nigga That.

I think it's bullshit that you expect me to accept the way that Black women are disrespected. This bullshit is why I don't watch the Image Awards anymore. I couldn't believe they nominated R. Kelly for a fucking Image Award in 2003 after he was accused of being a statutory rapist and child pornographer in 2002. And don't even get me started on The (muthafuckin' )Soul Train Awards. They gave the nigga "The Stevie Wonder Lifetime Achievement Award."

Did you know that show aired just two days before this "alleged" rape. Ain't that a bitch? I ain't sayin' that one led to the other, but I'm just sayin', son.

Pissed-edly Yours,
Sha'quaLanda


Dear Sha'quaLanda,

First of all, I hear you on the Image Awards, but it's not fair to pick on Don Cornelius n'dem. They never claimed to be about shit in the first place.

But if you're talking about hideous treatment of Black women on TV, you can not forget BET. I know you think I'm talking about the run-of-the-mill champagne spraying on inexplicably bikini-clad dancers type shit. But I'm not. I'm talking about "BET Uncut." You're only 13 so you should not watch this show. It is basically porn set to hip-hop. Luckily, though BET is on basic cable, they do warn that no one under 17 should watch the show.

That was a real relief for me. I know how kids never watch shit they're not supposed to be watching. And I expect you to stay away, too.

Yours In Decency,
NMN


Dear NMN,

OOOOOHHHHH! That was some nasty ass shit! Did you know that Ludacris' song "Booty Poppin'" is really called "Pussy Poppin'?" Is that what guys like?

Considering Promiscuity,
Sha'quaLanda


Dear NMN,

I never heard back from you on whether that is what guys like.

Anyway, we've been talking so much about how many different ways Black women get disrespected that I almost forgot why I wrote in the first place. Duke Lacrosse. I read today that sales on Duke Lacrosse paraphenalia are through the roof. I understand "innocent until proven guilty" but now it just seems like they are getting extra love for being accused of raping a Black woman. What the fuck is that about?!

Seriously Hurt,
Sha'quaLanda


Dear Sha'quaLanda,

I will have to write back at another time. I am in a bidding war on e-Bay for a Slave Masters All-Stars Throwback jersey. The slogan on the back of the shirt is: Who's up for a little cabin stabbin'?

Isn't that hilarious?

Preoccupied,
NMN


Nigga,

Have you lost your mind? This shit is fuckin' important. Did you know there was an email written by one of the players that they've printed in the newspaper. He said, ""[T]ommrow night, after tonights show, ive decided to have some strippers over. However there will be no nudity. i plan on killing the bitches as soon as the walk in and proceding to cut their skin off."

The defense lawyers said it was "in bad taste." The muthafucka didn't wear white after Labor Day! He didn't chew with his fucking mouth open! He described straight up killing and mutilating some "bitches."

Why won't anybody look out for girls like me? You're supposed to be such a strong Black man. Say something! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

Exasperated,
Sha'quaLanda



Dear Sha'quaLanda,

Nobody likes an angry Black woman. Try to remeber that.

You want me to say, "Fuck Duke Lacrosse!"? Okay, fine...

FUCK DUKE LACROSSE!

Ya happy now? But I still say that it's bigger than the Duke case. I'm usually not one to turn attention away from shit white people have done, but I feel hypocritical defending this woman's honor, when I see what Black women face every day.

This whole thing makes me think of what 2Pac said:

And since we all came from a woman
Got our name from a woman and our game from a woman
I wonder why we take from our women
Why we rape our women, do we hate our women?
I think it's time to kill for our women
Time to heal our women, be real to our women
And if we don't we'll have a race of babies
That will hate the ladies, that make the babies
(“Keep Ya Head Up”)

Of course he also said:

I wanna be a baller, please
But the bitches and the liquor keep on callin me
(Scandalouz)


So...what the fuck did he know? And for that matter, what the fuck do I know.

What's my point? I don't know. I guess it's that until I can figure out something more, I promise not to fuck you. Not literally (like R. Kelly who I hear is into the young'uns) or with my language. (You know how I like to lead with a good "First of all...Fuck (insert name)!". )

But my problem is that I believe that our community has historically sacrificed our girls and we continue to let you down. I look at my baby daughter and know that somewhere a guy who is already in high school is going to try to pick her up one day. I know that if an article saying that Black boys are struggling hits The New York Times, hands will wring and teeth will gnash. But what about her? What about you?

Who is going to tell you that poppin' yo' pussy is not the only way to go? Who is going to tell you that your "Daddy love me" issues can not be remedied by some grown fucking predator? Who is going to figure out how to structure a world where no Black girl has to strip her way through school?

Whenever, I look at my daughter, I'll think of you. And I'll be wishing you all the best. But I don't think I'll be able to shake this feeling that, even though I promise not to "fuck" you, if things don't change in our community, you may already be fucked. And not just because your name is Sha'quaLanda.

Take Care,
A New Millennium Nigga


2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Brilliant..absolutely brilliant! I will be sure to forward this one to people I know and see what they think!

Court

1:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

NMN
WHat can I say you have out done yourself again. I wish that we all could realize that we sweep all these issues under the rug and only make these problems worse. We sacrafuce our women inorder to protect our women. The way I see it you ain't my "nigga" if you continue to act like my enemy.
Much love from your latina
Greg Enrique

2:43 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home